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confuseacat
nofunanymore


1593 Posts

Posted - 10/13/2009 :  10:55:38  Show Profile Send confuseacat a Private Message  Reply with Quote



Hello Pythonlion!!! It's your old mate Graham!!!
Just thought I'd pop in and check out my favourite dead messageboard. I really don't understand why the other lads don't visit here, maybe they're just too busy being alive and all that blarmy. Anyway, I'm rewriting a few of the old sketches and thought I'd get some feedback from you lot. Here's the first one. If you like it I'll post some more if I can find my way back here again before all Hallow's Eve.


-------------------------------------------------------


Scene: A graveyard cafe. One table is occupied by a group of zombies. A dead man and his dead wife enter.

Man: You sit here, dear.

Wife: All right.

Man: (to Waitress) Mourning!

Waitress: Mourning!

Man: Well, what've you got?

Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and brains; egg bacon and brains; egg bacon sausage and brains; brains bacon sausage and brains; brains egg brains brains bacon and brains; brains sausage brains brains bacon brains tomato and brains;

Zombies: (starting to chant) Brains brains brains brains...

Waitress: ...brains brains brains egg and brains; brains brains brains brains brains brains baked beans brains brains brains...

Zombies: (singing) Brains! Lovely brains! Lovely brains!

Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor au Crevettes with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and brains.

Wife: Have you got anything without brains?

Waitress: Well, there's brains egg sausage and brains, that's not got much brains in it.

Wife: I don't want ANY brains!

Man: Why can't she have egg bacon brains and sausage?

Wife: THAT'S got brains in it!

Man: Hasn't got as much brains in it as brains egg sausage and brains, has it?

Zombies: Brains brains brains brains (crescendo through next few lines)

Wife: Could you do the egg bacon brains and sausage without the brains then?

Waitress: Urgghh!

Wife: What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like brains!

Zombies: Lovely brains! Wonderful brains!

Waitress: Shut up!

Zombies: Lovely brains! Wonderful brains!

Waitress: Shut up! (Zombies stop) Bloody zombies! You can't have egg bacon brains and sausage without the brains.

Wife: (shrieks) I don't like brains!

Man: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your brains. I love it. I'm having brains brains brains brains brains brains brains baked beans brains brains brains and brains!

Zombies: (singing) Brains brains brains brains. Lovely brains! Wonderful brains!

Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.

Man: Well could I have her brains instead of the baked beans then?

Waitress: You mean brains brains brains brains brains brains... (but it is too late and the zombies drown her words)

Zombies: (singing elaborately) Brains, brains brains brains. Lovely brains! Wonderful brains! Lovely brains! Wonderful brains. BRAINS! BRAINS! BRAINS! BRAINS! Lovely brains! (Lovely brains!) Lovely brains! (Lovely brains!) Lovely brains! brains, brains, brains, BRAAAAAIIIINNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!


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The Other OTHER Operation
Cheesemaker



686 Posts

Posted - 10/13/2009 :  15:25:59  Show Profile  Visit The Other OTHER Operation's Homepage Send The Other OTHER Operation a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Oh, well - if you're really into You must be logged in to see this link.

Also, Danish and Scandinavian books, see everything.
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Sheep Roost
Passenger on the Marie Celeste



2101 Posts

Posted - 10/14/2009 :  00:49:44  Show Profile Send Sheep Roost a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Mmmm, little zombie children...




If you're not pissed off with the world, then you're just not paying attention - Casey Chambers
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OneBurntWitch
Not The Messiah



426 Posts

Posted - 10/17/2009 :  03:48:36  Show Profile Send OneBurntWitch a Private Message  Reply with Quote
if you like zombies, you should see Zombieland. <3 teh bestest zombie moovie evar!! :)

P.S. I Love You Graham. I hope that, when I die, I shall be sent to visit you. It'll be a barrel of funn and only a little bit silly.

One witch slowly roasted over a hot pit of fire.
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ConcordeSpamaticus
Cheesemaker



915 Posts

Posted - 10/17/2009 :  09:46:14  Show Profile Send ConcordeSpamaticus a Private Message  Reply with Quote
He attended the Bafta's, didn't he? Clever little Pythons

Refusing to use the spoilchick
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confuseacat
nofunanymore



1593 Posts

Posted - 01/14/2010 :  15:52:22  Show Profile Send confuseacat a Private Message  Reply with Quote
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Horrible Harm
Moderator



2536 Posts

Posted - 01/14/2010 :  20:29:12  Show Profile Send Horrible Harm a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Is there a restaurant in Zombieland?
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confuseacat
nofunanymore



1593 Posts

Posted - 01/15/2010 :  12:27:06  Show Profile Send confuseacat a Private Message  Reply with Quote
No, but there is an all-you-can-eat buffet.
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Horrible Harm
Moderator



2536 Posts

Posted - 01/15/2010 :  17:51:37  Show Profile Send Horrible Harm a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Wokking the dead?
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The Other OTHER Operation
Cheesemaker



686 Posts

Posted - 01/16/2010 :  08:09:25  Show Profile  Visit The Other OTHER Operation's Homepage Send The Other OTHER Operation a Private Message  Reply with Quote
You must be logged in to see this link.

Also, Danish and Scandinavian books, see everything.
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The Other OTHER Operation
Cheesemaker



686 Posts

Posted - 05/28/2010 :  12:02:53  Show Profile  Visit The Other OTHER Operation's Homepage Send The Other OTHER Operation a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Ozzy is not dead yet.






Also, Danish and Scandinavian books, see everything.
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Horrible Harm
Moderator



2536 Posts

Posted - 06/01/2010 :  19:18:27  Show Profile Send Horrible Harm a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Dio is, allegedly. Gone over the rainbow
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